If you’re anything like me, you have been feeling the weight of everything going on lately. There is just one crisis after another right now- and EVERYONE is hurting in some way. My normal coping skills haven’t been working like they used to. A lot of highly sensitive people tend to want to numb out the pain, and I am one of those people. I love a good glass (or 4) of mind-and-feeling numbing wine. I also want to live, though, so I know that this isn’t a long term solution.
We (I) need something better.
Knitting hasn’t been helpful to me in a long time. I just have not had the energy to get through a row of stockinette, let alone a whole garment.
And that’s a part of it. I just don’t have the energy for anything else thats not necessary. When do want to relax, I am so wound up from the day’s activities, that my anxiety is through the roof. Let’s not even start about the depression and just barely scraping enough to check off “productive” on your day.
It often feels like I live on the bottom pyramid on Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. I have food, water, shelter. So that’s good- right? I mean, it’s a lot more than other people have. I should have no reason to feel anything less than content. But– it’s there. I feel the weight of everything and that there’s nothing I can do to change it.
I know that this isn’t a feeling that I feel alone. As lonely as it feels, I know I am not the only one struggling right now. Life has a way of just sucking at times. I get it.
Below are some things that take the sting of the times off for a few minutes: All of these things can be utilized while you’re knitting.
3 Ways to Find Gratitude in your Knitting Life
Have a Goal
Our family has a small tradition at dinner time. We try to think of three things that made our day good. It helps us focus on things that we love, rather than all of the negative noise that surrounds our lives. They don’t have to be anything huge, or even memorable.
Sometimes if I am really down, I try to apply this to my knitting- “I will knit one inch on this sock- and think of the things I love”
Applying a goal to my positive thinking helps me feel accomplished, and I am always grateful for that.
Goals don’t have to be giant. Goals do not have to produce anything. If you cant think about knitting, your goal can be “I wont feel guilty for not knitting this week” which leads me to:
Allow yourself days of unproductivity
If you’re like me, you HATE being unproductive. This is a hard life lesson for me, as I’ve learned that if I am not moving, doing, making, I am worthless. That is a lie, obviously. But I can’t shake that feeling.
Instead, I give myself room to have bouts of unproductivity, without guilt. Sometimes I just need to read a book all day. Sometimes I need to let my children just play without me. We’re living in a pandemic and slowing down is making our capitalist selves super itchy, but there is grace in slow.
Going slow allows us to step back and actually rest. It gives our brains time to heal. This is a time for healing. Write down what you’re feeling- how you feel that you need to heal-
Keep a Journal
I am a writer, so this comes naturally to me, but I am not anywhere near religious about it. I love to document what I’ve made and what I am thinking. Journaling can be stream of conciousness word vomit on the page. Or you can jot down your daily gratitude. There’s really no rules when it comes to writing down your feelings. It’s cathartic. Its private. It’s all about you and what youre going through.
Sometimes, I have a hard time being grateful without first letting go of so much hurt and pain. Without letting go of the unrealistic expectations I have made for myself. Journaling sheds all the angst for me. Journals are great for looking back and seeing just how much you’ve actually accomplished. You’d be surprised how incredible you really are.
Whatever is going on in your life, currently, you are worthy of a mind that is filled with peace and gratitude. You’ve got this.