This is going to be a very different blog than my last one. Practically a 180 degree turn.
Are you ready….
Here you go:
This also counts as a knitting post, because I made that adorable bear. (I made that adorable fetus too, in case anyone is wondering)
Some backstory: Last summer we were traveling from Alabama from my husband’s training, to Michigan for his sister’s baby shower. We had a long conversation about when we would be ready to be parents. Note: He has been confident and ready for years, while I have… well, neither been confident or ready. This is our relationship, he jumps and I very cautiously follow lest I break something. I am finishing college (Praise everything Light and Holy) and well… to be honest I was running out of excuses. And to be even more honest I am petrified of being a parent. At least this kid will have one competent parent, while the other flails and flops around and makes for a great dramatic performance. My husband’s enthusiasm was as contagious as it was a soothing balm on my fears; and we in the car ride, we made a plan for me to stop taking my birth control at the end of summer.
Clearly I don’t want to get into the gritty details with you, or anyone else for that matter. (If you need a lesson on the birds and the bees, I suggest you watch some old National Geographic documentaries for a few hours. I am sure that you can find them on Netflix. This is fully how I plan to tell my kid when the time comes, (or some awesomely awful 80’s sex ed books with graphic pictures, here you go spawn, kbye) because OMG I can’t even. The more I talk about not talking about it, the more awkward it feels…. sooooooo) All you need to know is that it worked and right before New Years I got that second pink line. So, no drinking for me when I went to an awesome NYE party, whomp whomp.
I am so glad it worked when it did though, because we were on our way to Colorado to see my family and I knew that I was going to tell my mom ASAP. It was risky of course, because everything could have gone down hill, but I couldn’t sit there and not take a chance. Every moment counts with my mom, who is in the advanced stages of Huntington’s Disease. My dad and sister say she understood, and I did get some lovely smiles, but I couldn’t tell. I am happy that she knows, and the baby is healthy. She wanted this for a long time. After I tested negative, she started bugging me about it, lol. We also told the rest of our family and our close friends while we were out there. It was fun.
I started knitting the bear when we got home, while my neighbor was in the hospital. Her death stopped things for a while, but I was able to continue the knitting and get it done about a week after we had our NT Scan. Dan made the adorable saying and after some pictures, we were live on Facebook. I honestly didn’t think I had that many FB friends. Ha. Pregnancy announcements are no joke.
It’s cool that we’re “out” now. I can say why I am having a weepy day, and why I didn’t remember an ounce of my reading or how to do a simple transaction at work, or why I want to barf when old ladies breath on me at work (this happens all the freaking time, and that feeling isn’t limited to pregnancy). It also gives life beyond grad school. I find that I am more zen about things. Which is so nice, because I tend to stress out when it comes to school. Now I am like, “eff it, I am pregnant”.
General health about me because FB posting about it is too personal: I’ve been feeling okay, with some horrid days in between. Morning sickness doesn’t end when the first trimester does, FYI. And I am in this stasis of not feeling any different and feeling all the things. It’s a new and strange experience and I want to take all the naps.
I am glad I have a ton of wine pictures and notes that I can keep up the wine posting. I am not opposed to the occasional glass of wine here or there either; but I am looking at research on wine and pregnancy, and it’s not looking promising. (it’s my number one craving too! )This is hard, and frustrating, I miss wine. Please be nice to me and let me sniff your wine, and I promise I won’t drop any hormonal tears into your glass.
Our life is definitely changing. I am glad I have a strong supportive husband who takes my crap with stride. He is incredible. I know that he is going to be a great parent. The jury is still out for me, but at least I can be entertaining, and kids need a little stress if they want to be creative geniuses. So there’s that. If you read this far, you’re amazing too! Thanks for taking this journey with me.